[ it's suffocating, the sudden pressure in his chest. isolating. roy hates being alone. he thrives on people, on the energy around him, on people pushing him forward. it's when he's alone that he makes poor decisions, that he falls off of his path. he hates who he is when he is alone. and he feels alone.
so he uses the code because he knows it will send riza running. it's selfish, he knows, to do that, but he also has no idea if he's in this room alone. he has no idea where he is. he thinks it's their room (and logic tells him that it is their room), but he doesn't want to announce his weakness to the world. it's irrational, and foolish, and childish, but --
the door is ripped open, and roy instinctively jolts at the noise, jumping to attention -- remaining in bed, but his left hand immediately grasps at his side, toward a knife that he sleeps with, tucked into the side of his bedframe and mattress . . . but he stops, immediately, when he hears riza's voice. and, almost as immediately, roy feels safe.
he's fine, as long as riza is here to be his eyes. don't panic. ]
What time of day is it?
[ his voice is hoarse, and unusually quiet. not authoritative, and he's not looking at her. his eyes are closed, but his head is now tilted slightly in her direction. listening carefully. placing out where she is in the room from where he remembers the door is.
he already knows, but he needs to hear her say it. for confirmation. ]
kisses
so he uses the code because he knows it will send riza running. it's selfish, he knows, to do that, but he also has no idea if he's in this room alone. he has no idea where he is. he thinks it's their room (and logic tells him that it is their room), but he doesn't want to announce his weakness to the world. it's irrational, and foolish, and childish, but --
the door is ripped open, and roy instinctively jolts at the noise, jumping to attention -- remaining in bed, but his left hand immediately grasps at his side, toward a knife that he sleeps with, tucked into the side of his bedframe and mattress . . . but he stops, immediately, when he hears riza's voice. and, almost as immediately, roy feels safe.
he's fine, as long as riza is here to be his eyes. don't panic. ]
What time of day is it?
[ his voice is hoarse, and unusually quiet. not authoritative, and he's not looking at her. his eyes are closed, but his head is now tilted slightly in her direction. listening carefully. placing out where she is in the room from where he remembers the door is.
he already knows, but he needs to hear her say it. for confirmation. ]